the deepest definition of youth is life as yet untouched by tragedy

aye! mi dad just moved a big potted plant into the attic where i'm surfing net and all the gigantic ants are crawling around me now!!! even the flying ones! YUCKS. i'm starting to feel itchy!

hmmm... i've kinda thot abt being in a relationship.. but i think i will realli have to give up now. i've decided tt he doesn't have those feelings for me animore. and he was probably just playing me n i took it too seriously.. it's sth tt i cannot resolve no matter how hard i try to. i've tried listing out the arguments for and against the fact tt he likes me and neither outweighs the other.. i've even made it as obvious as i possibly cud without losing too much face. probably he was confused last time la.. but as long as he will finally noe wad he wants.. i'm all right with losing all of this. altho it's gonna hurt but it's not gonna hurt forever ya noe. i spent too mani sleepless nights on this and probably mi biggest mistake was to have written so much abt mi feelings on mi blog.. maybe he hesitated cos of this but it has alreadi happened and if he's the sort of person who lets mi posts get the better of him.. den he's probably not worth it. i think i've finally remembered why i avoided guys in sec 3 and sec 4.. i thot i cud handle it when i was at trinity.. but i guess i mite have to wait a while more again.

oh wells.. right now mi goal is to act as normal and optimistic as i can. maybe after a while i will be. i dunno y i haven't been able to smile much lately in brunei.. let alone laugh. i miss stayin in melbourne cos i had so much personal space and time to express miself and vent mi frustration so tt i'll be happi the rest of the time. i think i onli smile genuinely averagely once a day now and it's mostly onli to mi mum.. tt's not gd cos i love it when pple smile. i love the crinkles around the eyes wit the soft gaze.. it helps u look radiant and younger! and it just makes the world a betta place.. i need to smile more!!!

oh btw~! i've uploaded pics to mi 2 new albums.. feb intake #3 and valedictory! sorri it's so late! and if u were wwondering abt the pic of mi in the creek.. haha it was during mi orientation camp and i realli had so much fun!